I’m sure everyone is aware that it is not healthy to compare ourselves to other people, sometimes we forget about that. We are asked why we’re not able to achieve things that others are enjoying. What have they done that we couldn’t? We think if we are better than someone else, why he/she is getting the best in life. We are just humans, pessimistic thoughts like these hit us so hard naturally but this must be controlled.
Comparing ourselves to other people will kill our happiness. That is a form of poison. Yes, other people are better than us but we should not cling to that, because if we do, we’ll get blinded by our blessings. If we tolerate our envious mind towards the achievement of others, surely we’ll get nothing but doldrums. It will only suck out our self-confidence and will turn miserable.
One of my favorite lines in “Desiderata” by Max Ehrmann states that, “If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain or bitter, for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself”. This line is so inspiring that we must remind ourselves of that all the time. Feeling jealous is almost inescapable but don’t let it consume our self-esteem. When you’re turning spiteful, shrug it away, be encouraged instead.
YOU DON’T KNOW THE STRUGGLES OF OTHER PEOPLE
Sometimes we only see the triumph of someone but we are clueless about their sacrifices just to get their feet there. We all have different stories and struggles. What seems to be faultless from the outside possibly has hidden suffering underneath the surface. And who knows those people having less is much contented and happier.
We must practice being happy with other people’s attainment as much as we want them to do the same for us.
HAVE PEACE WITH YOUR SELF, ACCEPT WHO AND WHERE YOU ARE
Accept that we are not perfect. Let’s not try to be someone we are not, we’ll only waste our time. When we yearn for something we don’t possess, we only demean ourselves. If we let our insecurities munch through us then we’ll never be happy. Not having other people’s attributes, strength, wealth and achievements don’t signify our life is not worth living. Everyone’s unique. Surely there is something you are good at that you just don’t realize because you are too busy looking at your weaknesses and failures.
KNOW WHAT YOU WANT IN LIFE
Don’t get confused about what society wants for you, recognize what you want in life. Let not other people dictate who or what you want to be. Don’t get mistaken for trying hard to achieve something because that’s what everybody has. If you do, the chance of failing is on the wayside.
Assess what truly makes you happy, evaluate your strengths and resources. Make use of other people as your reference but don’t compare. Sometimes the reason you compare yourself to other people is that you don’t know what you want in life.
DON’T LISTEN TO THE BAD SIDE OF YOU
We’re human beings, it’s unavoidable to think negatively especially if we fail on something. On every positive advice, we find contradictions, we always have reasons to side the darkness. And worst is we resent people for their achievements. But that is if you allow this mentality, this is only a matter of choice. We must not let the unenthusiastic side of us outsmarts us. Let’s try hard to change the way we see things. We must overcome our insecurities because no matter how less or extravagant we have, we’ll never be contented. It’s our attitude we must rectify because as long as we live, we’ll face people with something we couldn’t have. So if you find yourself detrimentally comparing yourself to others, remind yourself to STOP.
FOCUS WITH YOUR BLESSINGS, BE GRATEFUL
Because we are too busy minding the life of other people, we tend to forget the small blessings we have. We must not lose ourselves whining about the things we lacked. Counting our little achievements and realizing how heartbreaking losing the things we already have is a good start to change our perception.
EVERYONE HAS THEIR TIMELINE
Do not question your fate, everyone has their timeline. Good things seem to be vague at the moment, but surely, your spotlight will come. Don’t lose hope and work harder.
Remember Colonel Sanders, the founder of KFC embraced his success at the age of 62. Vera Wang who trampled her dreams of becoming an Olympic figure skater entered the fashion industry in her forties. Later on, she became one of the world’s valued fashion personas. They are just one of the names who succeeded in their line of business. I’m not saying you compare yourself to them rather we must be inspired and wait for our turn to shine.
Comparing yourself to anyone is not a battle between you and them, rather a fight against yourself. Comparing is not bad if it’s motivational, otherwise, it’s destructive, and that’s when it becomes poisonous. The only antidote is for you to stop matching up and focus on yourself, improve it, have a positive mindset, and accept the things you cannot change.
Let’s strive hard to be the better version of ourselves. If we are to compare, then compare with your old self and not with other people. Life is too short to be living it by copying others. Let’s be ourselves and find happiness in it.