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How to Increase Your Self Confidence

by Khola Usman
increase your self confidence

Before telling me how to increase your self-confidence let me give you an example. Imagine two students sitting in an exam hall for the final examination and 10 minutes are left until the exam starts. They are close friends, who have studied in the same class. You see one student, and he is all worried and sitting quietly having a grim and tense face as if he has already failed the exam. And then you see the other student, who is his friend, he isn’t worried at all, and having a smile on his face and a little chit-chat with other people sitting around him. He is completely relaxed as if he has already passed the exam.

Once you imagine this scenario, think what you felt for those 2 students. Among different thoughts, one can be that the first student was in a state of self-doubt while the other student was self-confident. This is my feeling after imagining all this.

From this, we can understand what is self-confidence. It is a feeling of being content with what you have got and a feeling of being satisfied with what you have achieved. It’s a belief that no test, no hardship and no challenge in your life is bigger than you.

“With confidence, you have won before you have started.”

But the thing is that the quality of self-confidence is not something that all are equally gifted with. Although someone may be naturally self-confident, while someone else maybe not. But mostly self-confidence is something that we have to build in ourselves with time. There are different ways to become self-confident. In my opinion, it is a gradual process. A person becomes self-confident step by step.

But I think that for a person who has been buried deep in self-doubt, the first step should be to shed off some weight of negativity and become a bit hopeful. Having some hope that I can do it helps a lot. And the next step is hard work. Because yes, hard work is the key to success, and success is what makes you confident. But the success part comes later.

The thing is when you work hard when you try, mostly this automatically leads the person to grow in self-confidence. The next step is to stop worrying too much about the outcome. Just focus on preparing the most you can for the exam that is coming, or the match that you are going to play, or a presentation that you have to give. You should know that worrying a bit may help you prepare better, but worrying a lot will distort you from the goal.


Keep following these steps until the day for which you are preparing. Now the last step for self-confidence is that, on the day of your test, exam, match, presentation, etc. don’t be worried. Just think that you have prepared enough for this time, and now it is just a few more hours. At that time, you have to believe in yourself and your hard work. There shouldn’t be even an iota of doubt in your mind that whether you can do it or not. Because yes, you can do it. And you will do it.

This is self-confidence. But in reality, our whole life is a challenge. Our minute everyday chores and tasks can be better managed if we are self-confident. This comes from different things. Some people believe that these are the material things that make us confident, such as dressing nicely and expensively, having an expensive car, moving with the protocol around, having money in your pockets and bank accounts, etc. But these are false standards. Of course, these things can help a bit, but the real self-confidence comes from within you. For this, we have to look into ourselves. We have to know our strengths and weaknesses. We have to understand our flaws as we all are flawed beings. These things lead to self-awareness which in turn leads to increase self-confidence.

Success Requires Confidence”

 There is one more thing that can increase your self-confidence. That is being on the right path, being honest, and being veracious. Because truth has so much power in it, that it makes a weak person so brave that he alone can stand against the might of governments. Knowing and speaking the truth is a great deed, which among many other things, also rewards its doer with a lot of self-confidence and inner peace.


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